Wednesday, March 19, 2008

I read an article recently where women complained about the bad habits the men in their life have.

Excuse me? Men have awful habits? What about women? They’re constantly looking in the mirror, or adjusting their thong or bra straps, often in public places! They insist on navigating in the car but a map may as well be in Egyptian hieroglyphics for all the sense they make of it! (And some of us guys are capable of asking for directions, thank you very much!).

They say, “Do I look fat in this outfit?” And even if they do look like an orca, you have to lie and tell them, “Of course not, darling! You look like a svelte model.”
Handbags? Black holes! I know what’s in my pockets, but there are things in a woman’s handbag that have probably been lurking there since first grade! Henry Morton Stanley explored some of the remotest parts of the world, but he’d blanch if asked to delve in one of those things!

Do the towels in the bathroom really have to be color-coordinated with the curtains?
And what is it with buying these fancy cosmetics with ginseng, aloe vera and so on? That's food! In times past people wouldn’t have put the stuff on their bodies - they’d have thrown it in the skillet and cooked it!

And if I do, just occasionally, want a burger and fries without salad, I can do without an hour-long lecture on the perils of cholesterol!
Well, I’ve ranted long enough about these annoying little habits of women… Does your significant other have any “little habits” they drive you up the wall? Post them here and share them with the rest of the world–embarrass your mate to give them up!